I hate it when my posts disappear!! I have tried to recreat it, but it is sloppy attest and doesn't quite say what I was able to put in words earlier...

I don't know why it is that within two months of an FTM either beginning T or about to, they break up with their partner because their partner is crazy. Sure, the number of people i spoke to and read about are not all that high, it could hardly be a statistical fact, but the fact it was All Of Them!!

Is it that there is a tendency on behalf of FTM pre awareness to hook up with crazy people?
Is it that pre existing issues become too much to handle because it takes the focus off their own journey that has to b centre stage?
Is it, as my friend a little further along in the transition process explained, suddenly everything about the partner becomes an irritant. Their affection becomes "possession", their support becomes "condescending", their love is "smothering" their questions are "nagging" and their chatter "harrassment". I have been told by a few guys that they looked back later and saw what was happening. That their partner hadn't changed, they had. But that takes the person actually being self aware.
Is it the stress of it all?

I think it is intersting. In my case, I think it is acombination. We had been under a HUGE amount of stress from even before and then during his awareness and then decision to transition. I don't know what is me, what is him, what is us and what is transition. They are all bound together and affect one another deeply.

Most of the guys who broke up with their partners regretted it. Only a few did anything about it. It seems that transmen dont like to look or go back, even if they have dropped something precious. They just see it as a learning experience.

I hope that is not the case for us although things are bleak. I will keep working on me and keep supporting him and loving him as best I can. Which right now means distance. I hate it. I don't want it. I am confused by it.

But I will still hope.